How old were your children when you let them use a public restroom by themselves?
I will only let my eight-year-old go into the cubicle by herself if I am waiting right outside (the cubicle, not the bathroom) – which I have been told is a little hysterical – and yet when I read this American mum’s Facebook warning earlier this year, it brought home just how important it is to vigilant.
Misty McDonald took to the social media site to describe a terrifying experience which happend to her son in the public restroom at a local crafts store.
Below is her terrifying post in full:
It has taken me a few days to decide whether or not to post this. For the protection of our babies, I’m going to.
Last Thursday Luke and I were in Michaels in JC. Luke has to go to the bathroom every time you turn around. So of course, “Mom, I’ve got to go pee.” I was in a hurry and thought “we are in Michaels, he should be fine.” I sent him on alone.He returned in a few minutes with a horrible expression on his face. He said, “Mom I just got really scared the worst I have ever been.” I asked why. He said that a man tried to get in the bathroom with him. I asked maybe if the man was just pulling the door to see if the stall was open. He said, “No mom, he jerked and jerked on the door trying to get in.” I asked if Luke could identify him, did he see him through the cracks? He said, “I looked at his shoes and I know what he had on.” I began scanning the store for the black, muddy, work boots Luke had described. All of the sudden I was two feet from the punk who attempted to enter the stall with my son. I froze. I looked him dead in the eyes and just stared at him. He smirked, kind of laughed, ran his fingers through his black greasy hair, and walked off. He knew I knew. He knew there was nothing I could do. I was stunned. My mind played over and over how different the day could have ended. I thanked God for his protection. That was all I could say, “Thank you Lord.”
You know, in my mind I’ve rehearsed all the things I would do to someone in a similar situation. Not a word would come that day, only shock and fear. In the same respect, we have told Luke a million times, “If anyone ever tries to bother you, scream and act like someone is killing you.” In that moment do you know what he did? Silent. Dead silent. He was scared to death and stayed as quiet as he could.
There’s a real good chance you or your children won’t respond in the way you’ve been trained, but I still believe training needs to be given. Luke and I will enter self defense classes. I will not ever let him go to the bathroom alone again. It’s awkward to take a 10 year old to the ladies room. I don’t care. I have a friend who says she opens the door to the men’s room and stands in the doorway while her son goes. Do something.
Also this incident forced me to have to explain to my child how he could be raped. While that is a horrid conversation to have, it is necessary. Before that day, Luke didn’t really know why to fear. He didn’t really know what could happen. In order to understand why things have to be the way they are, our children need to know the evil in this crazy world.
Pray for your babies, pray over them, for God’s protection. I’m humbled and there are no words to describe how thankful I am for God’s protection that day.
This is scary, I am sure you agree. And it also made me think – because I have had conversations about my own two children about what to do if strangers approach them, or if they feel they are in a threatening situation.
“Scream” – I have told them. “Scream as loud as you can for someone to come help you.” Which, you know, I am sure McDonald had done with her son too, and yet when he found himself in a situation that scared him, he reacted by doing the complete opposite, he froze with fear. Which you can see how can easily happen – even to adults when you are faced with a scary situation.
But regardless, I still think those safety conversartions are important to have – the more we talk about these things, the easier maybe to remember what to do in a scary situation. It’s hard, I think, for many of us, to have these talks, because it always feels a little like scaremongering, or that you are stripping your child of their innosence by letting them know there are bad people in the world.
But safety has to prevail, and so I’ll keep having them, hoping I never have to live through what this US mum did – or worse.
